Just mADE A PArabola og urine
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
