Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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