I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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