I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
