My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
