bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
These tits shall not be calmed
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
