Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
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