so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
Randomize
