Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
