Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
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