Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
zippers are such a cool invention
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
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