dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
