Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize
