i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize
