she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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