butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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