Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
I need to align my fucking chakras
Randomize
