dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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