But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Such a big mess for such a small penis
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