I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
