It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
