im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
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