Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
