Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
