he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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