butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
