why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
If I die, sorry about rent.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
