love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize
