guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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