Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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