when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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