Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Randomize
