I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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