I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
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