A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize
