Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
