Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
