Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Randomize
