Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
