is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Randomize
