You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
