I only kidnapped one of them. chill
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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