I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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