Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
