hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
Randomize
