she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
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