Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
