im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
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