You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
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