We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
i need some magic done to my vagina
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
